Last weekend, Bubby fell backwards off the swingset, into the sharp gravel beneath. He had a lovely, blood-gushing headwound. Of course, he wouldn't let me wash the blood out of his hair, so he looked like something fit for the upcoming Halloween holiday. (I started calling him "Headwound Harry", after a Halloween decoration I had seen last year...) He was also sporting a VERY red, chapped face. Instead of using a tissue, he just smears his snot all over his face. By evening, his cold was getting worse and we no longer had a humidifier.
I decided to take Headwound Harry with his chapped face to Target to buy a humidifier. (Daddy was out of town with the army.) I plunked him in the seat of the cart and Sissy started pushing him. Things were going pretty well. I was looking at something, when I heard Sissy yell. "BUBBY!!!! You kicked me in the NUTS!!!!" Apparently, he had been swinging his legs and kicked her where it counts. I stifled my laughter and explained to Sissy that girls did not have "nuts", nor was "nuts" a nice word. She was embarassed, and said "Okay".
Bubby has this new fixation with proving his sister wrong. Very competitive boy. He screamed at the TOP OF HIS LUNGS: "SISSY! GIIIIRRRRRLS DOOOOOON'T HAAAAAAVE NUUUUUTS!!!!!" in a very, smug way.
The whole store stopped moving. A pin dropping could have been heard. There were eyes on us. Other parents glaring at me. Headwound Harry with the chapped face was a site to behold BEFORE he screamed out that gem. I could just read the minds of the other parents, "Look at that mess of a child! And his dirty mouth to match!" I wanted to sink into the floor, but instead I had to focus on not falling in heap of laughter.
Both children later asked me: What *ARE* nuts anyway???? This was a good lesson for them not to say things if you don't know what they mean.
Parenthood: What a humbling experience.
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